This is one of the greatest human rights violations in the history of the US. Yes, it happens frequently. No, the mother’s are not lying about the abuse. Period.
A “must read” for anyone who is experiencing an abusive relationship:
“Crazytown is a place where your parent or romantic partner balances hell and utopia, you are one step away from hell and promised that if you take one step further you will find heaven.”
Bullying, Domestic Violence, Stalking and Street Harassment – are they really so different?
We constantly pussy-foot around these issues by making excuses, and either compartmentalizing or minimizing toxic behaviors. It should not be this difficult for a society to recognize HARASSMENT, which is how it usually starts. After it escalates or continues over a period of time, it has evolved into ASSAULT.
It’s as simple as that!
Please forgive my absence from this blog lately, and know that I have been extremely busy on the political activism front these days. We are witnessing exciting events, both encouraging and fearful, as the world is realizing that hate is at the root of all kinds of community violence – racially motivated, gender-based, and related to sexual orientation. Really, it is becoming evident that as in ancient times, people continue to form tribes based on similarities, and they exclude those who are different or do not conform to the tribes’ norms. Feeling threatened by the perceived infiltration of different ones, they are quick to ostracize and condemn the eccentric ones. In other words, they justify hateful behaviors against anyone who is different as a means of protecting the core tribe. Digital globalization has shattered our ability to remain in secluded tribes, and we must either adjust to the reality of diversity, or we will find ourselves having the similar fate of ancient tribes…
I do also want to mention a couple of interesting points on the domestic violence front. First, in regards to the Ray Rice dismissal of charges, please see my thoughts on the Tumblr blog:
Second, NBC is looking for survivors for an upcoming special. The details are on the Facebook page:
Thanks for supporting our cause. It reminds me how each of our individual lives do matter, and how strong a force we are when we join together!
Stalking behavior has nearly become an “epidemic” in the US. Learned through interpersonal behaviors in the family and with peers, it is perhaps the most efficient way to get whatever it is that one wants. It is becoming common to see the behavior in business and government these days.
I challenge you to correctly identify it whenever you hear someone or some group of people being blamed. I promise that you will see your world much more clearly by doing so. When you are skilled at stalking behavior identification, please speak up and educate others about this nefarious social disorder that endangers the freedoms of all of us.
“Don’t you know that a midnight hour comes when everyone has to take off his mask? Do you think life always lets itself be trifled with? Do you think you can sneak off a little before midnight to escape this?”
― Søren Kierkegaard
If we matter, then our words and actions carry substance too. Our existence within the Age of Virtual Reality, a period marked by digital innovations and rapid communications, keeps us safely tucked away behind our monitor screens. We become whatever we desire to be. Our avatars are not restricted to a face, and they abide in whatever scene best suits them.
Our virtual environment resembles a painter’s canvas, and is limited only by the reach of our imaginations. As social beings, we are compelled to piece our well-rounded lives inside compatible spaces, constructing a network of our own design. We strive to make our virtual life resemble our reality.
Yet, life does not come with a guaranteed number of perfectly shaped puzzle pieces, nor does it offer the smooth, stable surfaces necessary for the erection of a 3-D creation of our imagination. Whatever we do will affect those around us – this is one of nature’s laws. If we destroy our virtual neighbor’s property, we will face consequences for doing so. If we destroy people’s reputations online, we will be called out and confronted by our victims.
Everything we do is online is subject to the scrutiny of our peers. What is acceptable behavior within our neighborhood, may not be appropriate in a neighboring community of peers from diverse backgrounds. We might think it’s alright to exit…stage left, or to say, “goodnight folks; the show’s over!” But does our audience really believe us as they either shout for an encore, or continue throwing tomatoes at the stage?
You are the only person with the power to control your virtual performance, your setting, and your plot. You can contribute to your social network’s growth or it’s demise. That choice is yours alone. Just remember that the fabric of our society, whether online and offline, always has and always will depend specifically upon your choices and actions.
People are posting on social media with the #BlackLivesMatter hashtag, but doesn’t the message apply to victims of domestic violence and stalking too? Personally, I decided not to have any other children due to the ordeal inflicted upon myself and my daughter. Was that really my choice, or was it a necessary sacrifice based upon oppression? Race and Gender are often used as weapons by abusers and oppressors. The goal is the same: to enact power and control over another human being. The Ferguson issue is not only about race, but also about basic human rights (due process, life, liberty).
Sometimes oppression is generated from fear, or feeling dis-empowered. The police are supposed to serve and protect the population. Lately they are shooting first, and asking questions later. Ask any crime victim if the police are doing their jobs adequately, and you will be told no. Law enforcement needs appropriate training and support to do a good job. They are not getting it.
In short, the cycle of violence is not just an individual phenomenon. It occurs at the institutional level as well. When it does, it becomes oppression. Nobody wins when a system is corrupt and broken.